Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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