Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I love you. Go after that dick
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize