You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
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She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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