My room smells like vodka and shame
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize