Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize