i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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