your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize