Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Will exercising make me less horny?
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