you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize