Duck Duck Cougar?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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