yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize