Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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