Me too!
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
3 2 1 whiskey
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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