I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize