Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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