look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
It's never too late to be topless.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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