I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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