Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
being pregnant is like rehab
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
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