It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
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Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
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I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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