if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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