exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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