Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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