We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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