I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You've changed since you got that strap on
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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