Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
my sisters under your porch take her home
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
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