we have officially lost it.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
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Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
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Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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