Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
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