The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
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It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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