i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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