they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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