if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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