i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
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I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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