im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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