Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
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