I checked into jail on foursquare
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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