wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize