Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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