You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize