If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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