a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize