Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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