He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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