You can't special order awesome
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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