Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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