I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize