how can u be prego again
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize