She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
"it" just moved
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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