so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
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I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
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You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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