Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
