I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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